A Very Happy Un-Birthday is a fanfiction written by ARCUSTHEGODDESSOFRAINBOWS.
A Wonderlandian story set in the hallowed halls of Ever After High. Follow the preparations of Augustus Hare, Derk Dormouse, and Albion Rabbit as they journey in hopes of finding the perfect tea for the last un-birthday of Madeline Hatter before she turns 17. A daring adventure set in the Old Middle Kingdom, Shina, with dragons, emperors, and an unlikely friend. Will Augustus get through the trip without a Delirium Attack ? Will Derk finally stay awake this time? Will Albion not be late? Stay tuned to find out.
A Note from the AuthorEdit
Hello Hello Dear EAH-ers! I would like to apologize ahead just in case this story might take a while to finish but I will try my best. I'd also like to dedicate this story to all y'all Madgustus shippers aka one of my OTPs. Hahaha So yeah... Down the Rabbit Hole we go.
Chapter 1: More Than Just a Rainbow Connection (Also known as Augustus Hare's Story)
Chapter 2: SHE IS EVIL
More Than Just a Rainbow Connection
Augustus Hare sat lazily on a Looking Glass Land Mushroom as he waited for his sister, June Hare, to hop to it since it was the dawn of the school year of Legacy. "June Hexa Hare! We need to travel right this minute if you don't want to be late for the first day of school!" Augustus yelled to his sister's window. As Augustus sat there expecting a reply from his older sister, a cackle and a bump was all that he heard before Augustus got hit with something thrown from his sister's window that knocked him to the ground.
As Augustus regained his composure, he picked up the unknown flying projectile to his horror. "Sp-Sp-Sp-Sp-SPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!" he yelled opening a rabbit hole in the ground and throwing the accursed object into it. A small yelp of pain could be heard in the distance but that didn't get Augustus' attention. It was the fact of the insensitivity of his phobia by not just his sister but his entire family. As the March Hare's son marched right into his house, he seemed to have a sudden Delirium Attack in the middle of the kitchen. "Not in the kitchen...." was the last sane thing he said before everything went MAD.
Every time he blinked, the colors of his kitchen started swirling round and around and the plates had started growing stick arms and legs. A picture of a basket full of kittens had merged with the box of Heart Top Tarts right beside it into a flurry of Kitten Top Tarts flying around the kitchen, each one leaving a rainbow trail behind. As the flurry of Rainbow Kitten Top Tarts started singing some kind of repetitive sound like "Gus" in a pitch that Apple White could not match. Of course like in most times of his delirium, Augustus started screaming and throwing whatever he could grab at those kittens.
"Stop! Stop! Sttop! Leave me alone!" he kept on yelling running around the house trying to escape the wrath of the "evil rainbow kitten top tarts". Augustus' sane part of his mind had kept on trying to tell him that none of what he was seeing was real but the delirious part of his mind overpowered the young Hare's mind. Augustus ran around his house the bright colors swirling around in a spiral smashing anything fragile enough unfortunate to come to his path.
Augustus found his one refuge in the house, the cupboard under the stairs. It was nothing much, just a simple pitch black room with nothing but a simple arm chair. "Go away! This is not real!" he yelled covering his ears rocking back and forth in the room, whispers of madness and ridiculousness filling his ears. As Augustus was so fed up with all this madness, tears started flowing down his cheeks.
"Augustus! Augustus!" yelled a friendly voice behind the wall. It was the voice of his childhood friend, Madeline Hatter. All of a sudden, the whispers stopped. "Maddie?" replied Augustus coming out of his sanctuary. "August.... what happened?" asked the Hatter, avoiding the path of destruction that Augustus created. "Delirium Attack." said Augustus as he started picking up the pieces of broken cups and plates, his voice cracking a bit. "Oh..." said Madeline ,giving a look that not many people have seen, a look that didn't show madness, only concern and sympathy.
The sudden ringing of both their watches, made both the Wonderlandians smile and laugh. "Tea Time." said Augustus smiling as if his Delirium Attack didn't happen at all. Maddie then pulled out her tea set and table with Earl Grey asleep inside one of the tea cups.
"So August,It's the year of Legacy... I heard that your father is demanding that June would fulfill that Legacy...." said Maddie as she poured a cup of tea for herself and Augustus. "Yeah.... but I said that I'm happy to do it myself." replied Augustus sipping his tea.
"Your wish is my command , dear brother! I hate having that job anyway!" said June as she walked down the stairs. "I'm going to save the trees! and here's a little parting gift for you brother. From me,April, and May." added June as she disappeared into a hole in the ground after throwing a parcel at Augustus.
"Hey Augustus! How ya feeling Bro-Hare?" asked Derk Dormouse, Augustus's best friend, as he walked into the Hare household. "Hey Derk. How did you know I was.. you know.." asked Augustus. "Who do you think called Maddie over?" replied back the Dormouse. "Oh... Thanks." said Augustus. "Plus.. This is a good time for you guys to bond.. you know... as more... than...just friends." added Derk as he wiggled his eyebrows then ran away.
Augustus started turning pink when Maddie interrupted his train of thought, "What does he mean more than "just friends"? like SUPER BEST FRIENDS?" asked Maddie before being interrupted by her watch. "Oh... I have to go now.... I have to meet Raven in the Village of Bookend.Tea was hat-tastic! Bye August!" added Maddie as she packed up the teas set into her hat then skipped away into a Looking Glass portal. Augustus couldn't help but smile because of the Wonderland madness his friends brought over. "Wait! Am I late for school?" Augustus yelled. "School's still next week Augustus!" yelled Derk from his house. His family must have bought the wrong calendar. "Well. That's just dandy!" Augustus boomed as he disappeared into a rabbit hole to visit The Village of Bookend.
SHE IS EVIL
“So August, How’s old Haigha? Heard he’s been travelling into farther and farther kingdoms.” asked The Mad Hatter. Augustus had stopped by the The Mad Hatter’s Tea & Hat Shoppe in Bookend for a quick cup of tea with his uncle. “Oh dad’s just doing fine Uncle Hatta. He is branching out the Hole-In-The-Walls into further kingdoms. Business is an uncanny talent of his.” answered Augustus as he took a sip of Dandelion Strawberry tea from his special cup in the Shoppe.
“That’s hat-tastic to know August, now…. Tell me, why is the bread so great when the yeast is late?” riddled the Mad Hatter as he grabbed his saucer and started dipping it in his own cup of tea. “Well, the grain of flour is so fine that the risers must also be divine. A tea without a bee is still a tea but more bitter than sweet cheddar cheese.” answered Augustus in riddlish, the native tongue of the Wonderlandians. “Very well answered August. I must do say, you kids are speaking better riddlish than all of your parents.” cheerfully bellowed the Mad Hatter as he enthusiastically clapped for Augustus.
The Mad Hatter clapped so hard that he fell off his seat on the wall and landed on a table where two future fairy godmothers were chatting with a future witch, startling them so much that the three accidentally poofed themselves away from the Shoppe, forgetting to even pay their bill. The Mad Hatter was also unfortunate enough to spill tea on himself and break the floral pink teapot .
“Well, that was just rude, they did not even bother to thank me for the tea. Oh well, I guess you can say the tea is on me.” Said the Mad Hatter as he stood up and pointed to the cracked piece of a teapot on his mint green-haired head.
Augustus laughed so hard that he too fell off his seat and landed on the ground safely, except for the fact that he landed on his rear, making his behind feel quite sore. “The time was great Uncle Hatta! But I must be leaving. I’m meeting the other Wonderlandians for a Hocus Latte later.” said Augustus as he stood up ,rubbed his sore rear, and dusted himself off.
“Oh yes. Well, thank you for stopping by August! And don’t forget that it’s almost Maddie’s birthday!” yelled The Mad Hatter as Augustus ran out and opened up a rabbit hole for himself. Augustus arrived in his dorm room in Ever After High in no time. He hoped that he’d be rooming with someone other than his sister this year and luckily for him that someone was no one. Augustus fell into his orange bed face down relishing the comfort it surrounded him. “A room just for myself!” Augustus said though his words were muffled.
Augustus loved the solitude his dorm room provided until his door flew open featuring the sight of Derk Dormouse and Albion Rabbit. “Augustus! Bro-Hare! Why did you get such a big room?” asked Derk as he walked in inspecting every nook and cranny in the orange and blue-toned room. “June’s not coming to Ever After High anymore. She’s dropped out.” answered Augustus as he man-hugged Derk and Albion. “That’s unfair. My roommate is another Prince…” said Albion giving a somewhat humorous effect to the word “Prince”. “Really? Do tell.” Said Augustus as he lied down own his bed horizontally. “Ehh… He’s from a ballet… The Swan Pond thing.” said Albion. “Don’t you mean Swan Lake?… and you said “he” meaning…. That… he’s probably Prince Siegfried’s kid.” Said Derk as always, overanalyzing things. “I guess so.” bluntly replied Albion.
“Okay… I think it’s time to go to Starbooks. I think the others are waiting for us.” Said Augustus. “I don’t think so. I saw that they are gonna be late so why can’t we be late?”said Albion, referring to his foresight. :Okay then, so wha-“ said Derk before the three Wonderlandians heard screams and cries from outside the corridor. “What was that?” asked Derk. “I think it came from near the main doors.” Said Albion. A rabbit hole then appeared right under the three guys and led them to the main doors. “-aven Queen! RUN! “ Shouted the littlest pig. “She is evil!” yelled the Son of the Hero of Haarlem before being splashed by water from a broken pipe. “Run everyone!” said the daughter of Little Bo Peep as her sheep also baaaaaaa-ed in terror of Raven Queen, the daughter of The Evil Queen. Everyone suddenly went running away as the three Wonderlandians hid amidst the panic.
“See? They love you!” said the wonderlandiful voice of Madeline Hatter. Raven looked a bit saddened by everyone’s reaction to her what seemed to be entrance. Suddenly both Maddie’s and Augustus’ watches started ringing.
“Yaaaay! Tea time!” said Maddie as she took out her tea set from her hat. Raven then walked away from Maddie seeing that she was enjoying her dormouse’s, Earl Grey’s, company. As Raven walked away, the three boys could not help but feel shivers down their spines. The aura of an Evil Queen (or Princess, for this case) will always give you Mother Goose-bumps.
“Hey Maddie!” said the three in unison as they walked to her. “August! Derk! Albion! Nice to see you. Care to join me for tea time?” asked Maddie as she pulled out three more chairs two more tables, and another tea set from her hat. “Thanks Maddie but aren’t we supposed to b going to Bookend right now? I bet Kitty,Lizzie, Twixie-dee, Tracy-dum, Alistair, and Katta are already awaiting us in Starbooks. “Oh yes! Why did I forget the time in the day?!” said Maddie as she packed up her tea sets, chairs, and tables into her hat. “Now, let’s go!” added Maddie as she took a step closer to Augustus. Augustus then opened yet another rabbit hole to take them to Starbooks.